Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Crankythoughts

Overheard--Man and girlfriend walking on sidewalk. Man veers toward convenience store.

Man: I'm gonna get some beer.

Woman: You're gonna carry that all the way home?

Man: NO I'M GONNA FUCKING HAVE THEM DELIVER IT! (walks into store)



Little girl with adult woman in a playground. Girl trying to reach monkeybars.

Little girl to Isaac (tall): Will you help me reach the bars?

Isaac: I don't know...ask your mom.

Little girl: I don't HAVE a mom!




TODAY IN THE WORLD:

Ancient languages lost: 2
Euphemisms for genetalia coined: 12

Ethnic stereotypes debunked: 3
Ethnic stereotypes reinforced: 54

Spent by Americans on books: $63,016,398
Spent by Americans on pro sports: $547,945,205

Births: 353,015
Deaths: 146,357
New planets colonized: 0




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